Wow. An incredibly happy day and scary day all in one. There's so much I want, so much I wish, and so much I want to wish, but I can't.

I feel like it's right at my fingertips, but I just can't reach far enough to get it. Maybe I'll break free someday and turn into Stretch Armstrong and get what I want for a change instead of doing what other people want. Or what I think other people want.

Please, God, grant me the courage and wisdom to do what's right and please keep her going strong. She deserves the world.

I GOT INTO FLORIDA STATE!

So today was the most emotionally unstable day I've had in a really long time. I'm so worn out. I should probably go to bed instead of be sitting here and typing. I hate being mad at people and I hate the fact that I jump to conclusions and I hate the fact that I missed singing the national anthem at the last home with game with the other seniors. Oh well. Tomorrow's another day. I did like seeing Kimmmiey and Sam today, though. Yay God for old friends. And new ones. And ones that are always there for you no matter what.

And yay God for weekends home from college.

Drumroll: Beauty and the Beast.

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.

Today was like the most emotional day ever. It was up and down and up and down. I can't wait for this weekend. I'm so excited about Mel and Linds coming home.

Oh. And I have the greatest friends ever. Thank you for making me feel better. Even though we didn't jump the fence.

So all today I kept thinking what a bad day I was having. Everyone in GRGC walked in this morning and explained to me how MAD Mrs. Rawson was at me for missing GRGC last night and going to the concert (which was AMAZING, by the way- three cheers for seeing Mel). I hate disappointing people and having people mad at me. So that started my fantastic day. Then in econ I got the overwhelming urge to cry...except I don't cry, so I didn't. It was an odd feeling that I wasn't sure what to do with.

I started missing people all of the sudden. During second period, while I was supposed to be "Reviewing the Facts" I was writing a note about how...wierd I was feeling. I needed my music, I needed people to stop being obnoxiosly stupid, and I needed 3 certain people just...there. It was one of those feelings where you needed those certain people in order to make everything better.

Then my mom parked my car illegally, I didn't finish my econ homework, I was late to Mrs. Rawson's, and my punishment for missing yesterday was to earn back my position as slapstick. So all in all, my day wasn't too hot.

But looking back, I think I was just dwelling on that shit. Rawson wasn't very mad, and there were a lot of people being really nice to me- I just didn't take the time to notice. Now I feel bad. And when I got to Rawson's, Parker came running up to me with a huge "HEY!" which made me feel a little better.

The only thing to make this night a complete make-up for today was if I could have gotten the underwear from VS.

So I was in a bad mood. I had to finish applications, clean my room, update my calendar, and my voice is gone. I discovered that things I have to do are getting in the way of things I want to do (All State auditions and Duke game, anyone?). I can't think of all the songs I want to put on the list of my "reertoire" for the FSU application. Etc.

Then I put my away message up, looked at my buddy list, and low and behold. There, staring me in the face, was Gilmore Girls ad.

It's the little things that really make your day better. Like when I was at the doctorreading a magazineand Gilmroe Girls was in there 3 times.

FSU this weekend, bitches. Watch out, Orange Men.